We have all had the unfortunate experience in life of having to speakΒ with someone who is demeaning and offensive in how they approachΒ a matter. They seem to relish putting people on the spot. SomehowΒ they think that taking a hard-hitting approach will drive home their pointΒ more effectively. Usually the opposite is true, because their manner ofΒ speech is speaking more loudly than what is being said. Rather than relationshipsΒ being strengthened, they are destroyed by abrasive words.
This type of response from the unsaved shouldnβt surprise us, but itΒ should never be true of a believer in Christ. Sadly though, it is becomingΒ increasingly true in the Christian community. One of the graces thatΒ nearly has been lost in the Church today is tact. Tact is a βkeen sense ofΒ what to do or say in order to maintain good relations with others or toΒ avoid offense.β Essentially, it is having perception and grace when dealingΒ with others. The Apostle Paul was a seasoned veteran in the art ofΒ tact. While he could be firm when it came to confronting error, he alwaysΒ did so with grace, hoping to restore the offender. More often than not,Β however, he exercised tact to accomplish his purpose.
A good example is when Paul addressed his countrymen in JerusalemΒ who were determined to take his life. As he was being led away to theΒ castle, he requested that the chief captain allow him to speak to the unrulyΒ mob. Weβre sure this probably seemed to be a strange request to the RomanΒ captain, but he gave Paul permission to speak to his countrymen.
βMen, brethren, and fathers, hear ye my defense which I make nowΒ unto you. (And when they heard that he spake in the Hebrew tongue toΒ them, they kept the more silence: and he saith,) I am verily a man whichΒ am a Jew, born in Tarsus, a city in Cilicia, yet brought up in this city at theΒ feet of Gamalielβ¦β (Acts 22:1-3).
Before Paul shared his conversion on the road to Damascus, he, tactfullyΒ addressed them with titles of respect, βmen, brethren, and fathers.βΒ Then he perceptively spoke to them in the Hebrew language, the motherΒ tongue of the chosen nation. Notice their response, βthey kept the moreΒ silent.β Once he had their undivided attention, Paul identified himselfΒ with them, revealing that he was a Jew, born in Tarsus, but lived mostΒ of his life in Jerusalem, where he sat at the feet of one of their reveredΒ doctors of the law, Gamaliel.
Thatβs tact! May the Lord give us this type of discretion when weΒ minister to others! And may it be to the praise of His glory. source